This was an up date i made some 2 years ago, which remains incomplete.
----------------->""Well...after all that had happened I truly deserved a real treat. It was necessary for me to try and do something exceptionally merry. I hoped like anything that this Christmas turns out to be a real benchmark b'coz i needed some really strong memory to keep me off the quite frequent but omnipresent out bursts of negativism.(refer to Haphazard)
I don't mind being sad...but i mind being sad for the same reason over and over again so many times.I m surprised that sadness itself hasn't got bored of me already...But never mind that now.*rolls eyes*
So where was i? yea...i was at the verge screaming out loud that i need a break!
and what break can be more welcoming than Christmas itself?!
I tried to invoke the dormant social butterfly inside of me.(partly to check whether its still alive or not >_>) and hurray!it woke up!(though it was still lazy after the long slumber)
In other words...I concentrated my attention to take a grand and fruitful attempt at Christmas.
I thought of some possible expeditions that i can indulge myself into.This was almost a week before Christmas itself...i know..plenty of time eh?...think again.It took me most of the week to just decide on what kind of celebration i want to have.""----------
----------------->""Well...after all that had happened I truly deserved a real treat. It was necessary for me to try and do something exceptionally merry. I hoped like anything that this Christmas turns out to be a real benchmark b'coz i needed some really strong memory to keep me off the quite frequent but omnipresent out bursts of negativism.(refer to Haphazard)
I don't mind being sad...but i mind being sad for the same reason over and over again so many times.I m surprised that sadness itself hasn't got bored of me already...But never mind that now.*rolls eyes*
So where was i? yea...i was at the verge screaming out loud that i need a break!
and what break can be more welcoming than Christmas itself?!
I tried to invoke the dormant social butterfly inside of me.(partly to check whether its still alive or not >_>) and hurray!it woke up!(though it was still lazy after the long slumber)
In other words...I concentrated my attention to take a grand and fruitful attempt at Christmas.
I thought of some possible expeditions that i can indulge myself into.This was almost a week before Christmas itself...i know..plenty of time eh?...think again.It took me most of the week to just decide on what kind of celebration i want to have.""----------
I'll tell you what happened. I never got to celebrate that year. I prepared a grand feast for myself, bought cakes and all. But made plans to hang out. And go watch a movie by myself.But it around 4:30 pm it started to ...and i felt so let down! I almost cried. Will everything, even Nature itself get in the way of my happiness?WHY?
Then a crazy idea struck me! But suddenly i felt like getting wet! There was no one at home(mom went to a neighbor's and got stuck there due to rain), So sneaked out in the balcony and stepped into the cold freezing rain on 25th December evening.The sun had gone down...but there was light in the horizon. And i did nothing...kept standing there and getting drenched and chilled to the bone.
The feeling, the experience,- it was emancipating... I was liberated from the claustrophobic darkness engulfing me, and as my senses started getting numb....I realized how much my senses still worked.
That was the Christmas treat i had for myself on the 25th of December in 2008.
Later, that evening, i remember, my friends paid me a visit. I too went out with them when the rain stopped.But, though i cu the cake and all, i had this terrible headache which turned into a fever by midnight...and i faintly remember enjoying my mother's care and rebuke.
^_^
The feeling, the experience,- it was emancipating... I was liberated from the claustrophobic darkness engulfing me, and as my senses started getting numb....I realized how much my senses still worked.
That was the Christmas treat i had for myself on the 25th of December in 2008.
Later, that evening, i remember, my friends paid me a visit. I too went out with them when the rain stopped.But, though i cu the cake and all, i had this terrible headache which turned into a fever by midnight...and i faintly remember enjoying my mother's care and rebuke.
^_^
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